I am updating this blog, like once a week. This is bad, really bad. *shakes head*
My 2 weeks vacation has officially started since Friday and I have been catching up with all the dramas I have been missing out.
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Was out with Shermeen few days back and somehow they idea of getting old kind of ate into me, on top of Shermeen’s latest blog post, growing old is becoming real. Like next year I am hitting my first 2 and I am dreading the idea. We were talking about how happy it was when all of the girls gathered around a small table in the morning before assembly and how we always buy lollipop steak during recess and helping Shermeen open her water bottle. It was all so sweet and simple then.
I’m not so afraid of not being able to find a lifetime partner or dying alone. It doesn’t matter as much as it did compared to the me last time. Everyone comes alone, so they leave alone. It is the cruel circle of life. I don’t mind not being able to have kids as well. I don’t want to go through the complex feelings of not being to look after my kids when I am too old to do so, cause honestly, if I really would to have kids, I would probably not be a young mother. I don’t exactly like kids very much as some may know.
I mind, however about the clothes part. I see all the auntie clothes as City Plaza and I ‘m like, “there is no way I am going to wear a deep purple bling bling dog face silk-like material tee shirt when I grow old!” I want to wear whatever I am wearing now, jeans, knit wear, long sleeves basics, burgundy colors, pretty heels, being able to wear all those and nobody is going to say you are overdressed, which is why sometimes I look at clothes and I just want to buy them and wear them, cause maybe 7 years later, people are gonna ask you to dress your age, not unless if you are a celebrity or a model.
It is a lil’ scary alright. I’m not being materialistic or whatever, I mean sure, you can be thinking “of all things, that’s what you are worried about?”, but c’mon, age isn’t something you can hide, (unless you have the money to inject some stuff into your face, which I am totally against.) .
Honestly, I just want a life where I can complete my education, get a stable job and live a life of peacefulness. Nothing to big that can change my life completely, I mean it’s not like I haven’t had enough of such crazy ass troubles in my life yet. I am willing to get all these shit in exchange for a quiet, worry-free life in future. & when I say worry-free, I don’t mean I must be super rich or whatever, just enough to let me get by, you know what I mean?
Lol. Now is too early for me to say anything anyway.
Anyway, if you are curious on how I am going to spend the day when the most beautiful man of my life is born, I am planning to go for a church service my dear friend invited me to, followed up by partying with the girls at some club after, not sure where yet though. Hehe. P/s. Those are plans on the 24th.
